Today I attended a conference from the author of this book. I haven’t read so didnt have much background and didn’t pay full attention to the invitation too…
Some notes:
Change is the norm! Not the exception.
Change is just change (sometimes is good, sometimes is bad. Accept it)
The idea is to move to a mindset of “order -> change -> reorder” instead of trying to get things as they were before.
4 steps about Change: Accept, Embrace, Take proactive action, Move forwards to somewhere new.
The idea is to be “rugged and flexible” in three aspects
- 1) Mindset:
- – Develop a “being” instead of “having”: ie I am a good engineer vs I have a job.
- – Set expectations + update accordingly
- – accept the indeniability of change
- 2) Identity:
- – Diversity of sense of self: a.k.a Have a diverse portfolio of your personality. I liked the example of Nils Van der Poel. Before the Olympics he wasnt performing and and reason was he was scared…. He was only Nils the skater. He decided to have a live during the weekends… (not just the skater) and then at the Olympics, he smashed. He created different selfs so there wasnt just one. So it is easier to get scared if shit happens. Or it is like having a house with just one room, if something happens your are out. You need to look after those rooms though.
- – Figure out your rugged boundaries: Your core values. Those should be:
- — 3 or 5
- — well-defined
- — concrete them daily
- 3) Action: 4 Ps: Pause (breath, label feelings), Process, Plan, Proceed. Action created motivation, not the other way around. So dont wait for the motivation, just do. Be patient. Compassion about self. And resilience = Social support + routine.
When change happens, you core values will keep you floating.
Good talk.