Somehow, just by chance, I feel the last three books I have read are connected. And this last one, has been a real slap in my face. And deserved.
In the last years, I have complained about stress at work, dissatisfaction, etc. And questions about what’s my goal in life. What I am really doing apart from working (and climbing and reading and cooking). As well, this is connected to my breakup.
I have changed job twice, and still in the same situation to be honest. I knew the problems wasn’t the job. It was me. It was my expectations. But still stuck.
I have read a lot about Stoicism, Buddhism, meditation, etc. And I really believe on those philosophies as the ground stones of my moral.
But I didn’t lead by example. That is the best piece of advice that my first manager in UK (and the person who gave me the chance to work here) told me and have always try to live by.
The book reminded me the worse experiences of my life: dead, heartbreaks, letdowns, etc. But then reminded me of the growth I experimented after that. I forgot those futsal games that were so intense, those kumites with people much more stronger than me, those difficult exams, competitions, races. I forgot the satisfaction of giving all, the learning, the challenge, the growth from defeat and failures. Growth.
And I know, without that stress, I wouldn’t have improved. So, I have been making things worse trying to escape it.
As the book says, pain is part of life, one way or the other, so you’r better off to deal with it face on because there are too many things out of our control. But we are in control of the most important one, ourselves.
So at the end, it is all about your mindset. The worse moments can bring the best of you. Because you are not alone there.
And this is a new habit I want back to the core of my moral. And think it is already working. For the last weeks I have been struggling with an injure and I knew my feelings about work were not helping. This week, I was nearly alone most of the week dealing with the major projects. Normally I would be very stressed. But I tried to think as challenges. Maybe the week was quieter than normal but I felt better at work and in my body.
I want to see if these are just words or a real shift. More challenging times will come (for sure).